What ever happened to the drizabone?

Far be it for me to talk about the Olympics without chastising the Chinese but will we see the Aussie drizabone in this week's opening ceremony?

Whispering Jack use to wear one before he got old and fat for one more time. They always look to me like someone's skinned a horse or found a gigantic not to scale flake and ripped it's outer choc part to turn into a coat. I'd like to see the swimmers just wear their cossies in the opening ceremony and wear the drizabones in the pool. Imagine pulling the 1500m off in skinned horse? They'd be no talk of records...just survival. Kind of like the Duke of Edinburgh award where you have to tread water for an hour in a pair of trackies. And diving...diving is overrated. I don't see why the relays don't start with a bomb in the pool.

I think we need to introduce the aussie pool party into the Olympics.
Gotta start at the barbie chomping on a snag, turn up triple M, put some sunblock on, down a keg and then jump in the pool. swim half a lap, grab a pool pony at the 50 metre mark and get to the 100. At the 200 mark, pick up the 2 year old child at the bottom of the pool, perform CPR, and get them a gig on today/tonight at the same time. Hit 300 metres, and whinge that John Butler didn't make it into the top 5 of the hottest 100. Almost there, 400 metre mark, it's time for Marco Polo ( hang on..aren't the Paraolympics, next week? ) and cane it real hard to the finishing line, touch the end of the pool, and spew - the snag, the keg and the breezer.

Now that would add some real entertainment to Beijing 2008.

And all the while..Nikki fucking Webster....the pre pubescent Nikki ....is swinging ABOVE the pool.

Austrayans all let us rejoice.